


Waves Crashing In

by Nadja_Lee



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: BAMF Jim, Empath, Fluff, Happy Ending, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Shaman Blair Sandburg, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-12-11
Updated: 2006-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:13:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22998241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadja_Lee/pseuds/Nadja_Lee
Summary: Jim’s senses are so fixed on Blair that he can ‘sense’ him when he’s displaying strong emotions….from halfway across the city.
Relationships: Jim Ellison/Blair Sandburg
Kudos: 40





	Waves Crashing In

**Waves Crashing In**

The first times it had happened Jim had told himself he just had good instincts…maybe not even that. Maybe it was just common sense. He had been sitting at work going over some files for his latest case when suddenly he had been hit with a blinding pain in his skull and for a moment he had to fight a wave of dizziness and nausea. As quickly as it came did it pass and Jim had been about to dismiss the episode if not a growing uneasiness had taken hold of his heart and the one name, Blair, had kept dancing on his brain. He had withstood it for 20 minutes before he had called the University. After the third ring Jim had worked up a panic when Blair’s tired voice finally reached him. To his relief Blair had assured him he was alright and that he could ease up on the ‘Blessed protector’ routine which, admittingly, ever since he had resurrected Blair after Alex’s attack, had been working overtime. Relieved Jim had been about to dismiss it all to just that, uneasiness after having come so close to losing his Guide, when Blair had told him he had been ill earlier in the day, probably something he eat the day before. He had been throwing up and feeling dizzy but was feeling better now. Jim had managed to make Blair promise to be home earlier to relax and the call had ended, leaving Jim baffled and uneasy about just how this information and his sense from earlier had been connected. 

After the ordeal with Alex things had changed between them. Blair had had an epiphany brought on by his second chance at life as he called it. He wanted to live life to the fullest and not waste another minute. He had changed the subject of the dissertation he would hand in, now working the police society angle, having realized that it wouldn’t be wise or safe to publish his Sentinel dissertation. That would remain his private study topic and one he was as eager to explore as always, no small amount to Jim’s seemly ability to resurrect him. Blair had decided to wrap his dissertation up quickly so he was very busy as he was to defend it in a few weeks. Their relationship had also changed. Sure, Blair was still his friend, warm, concerned and there but he seemed to…live more for lack of a better word. Do more whatever he wanted and felt like. Jim was more protective of him than he had been before, trying not to let it show though. He was also more determined than ever to let Blair be happy and do the things he loved – even if it meant he would be far from him. It was this realization, that he put Blair’s happiness above his own, which made him realize that he loved Blair more than anyone else he had ever known. That he wanted Blair as more than a friend…wanted him close in all ways. But when he looked at Blair now, so filled with life, eagerly throwing himself into work and dates with numerous women, going on full speed, even more than before….then how could he ever approach him? What did he have that Blair might want to share eternity with him and him alone? So he did what he had always done, observing at a distance.

Then the episodes had happened and distance had suddenly become impossible. That first time Jim had done what he always did when something new and strange in connection to his senses showed up; he ignored it. The next episode slammed into him while he was at a crime scene. The force of the images playing before his eyes forced him to take several steps backwards and hold a hand to his head in pain. As before the episode lasted two minutes at most and so did the pain yet the feeling was clear; Blair was in danger. The images had made little sense but the feel of them; strong, violent and bloody, had remained. A quick word with Banks had him in his truck and driving towards Blair in record time. Without thinking he drove, just knowing he had to reach his Guide. It was first when he parked outside a small grocery store than he briefly wondered how he knew to come here. Pushing that thought away he had listed for his Guide and found his heartbeat racing away in fear inside the store together with a couple of others. He had also heard the sound of weapons being clicked and men yelling. A robbery. He had pushed worry aside and had focused on saving the people inside; none more than Blair. Jim had quickly called it in and had then gone in after his Guide. After ten minutes he had taken the robbers, luckily more scared boys than angry men, down while Blair had gotten the civilians to safety. When he was reunited with his Guide he had had to fight the urge to embrace him and take him far away to make sure he was safe.

A few more episodes had followed where Jim had been able to tell if Blair was very upset (his deadline had been pushed two weeks forward), angry (a favourite student had cheated on an exam and Blair had been the one to tell him the one episode had ruined his academic life), in danger (not surprisingly with Blair’s record, that tended to happen often), hurting (anything from violence related to the dangerous situations he seemed to find himself in a lot to ‘every day’ things like hangovers, hunger, a bleeding paper cut or getting burned from a hot cup of coffee) or afraid (places, situations or people that made him uncomfortable). It wasn’t easy sharing in Blair’s life this way and not really be a part of it but Jim had decided not to tell Blair, figuring that his love for independence and freedom would be damaged by the discovery that his friend would most likely always know such intimate details about him no matter how far away he might be from him. Secretly he had to admit that despite the torment the observer role in Blair’s life gave him; always seeing yet never touching, it also calmed him. Sensing, ‘seeing’, when Blair was afraid or in danger meant that he very rarely were hurt these days because Jim could get to him before that happened. 

He had been less happy to put it mildly, when he had started receiving the visions or whatever else he could call them, at night. At first he had figured it was just a wet dream yet why would he sense and ‘see’ Blair make love to a woman and not him? The sensory attack from it, like the others, was very real and sometimes even made him come if the Blair of his visions did so. It hadn’t taken long for him to put two and two together; he was also able to get impressions from Blair when he was aroused or excited.

With military determination he had convinced himself he could live with this. Blair might never be his but he could live with the pain of watching, feeling him, finding release in someone else’s arms. It was a small price to pay for the ability to sense if he was in danger, to be able to track him down from half way across the city as if his very being was his beacon. 

After almost six months had passed Jim had to admit his control was slipping. The painful flashes came suddenly and were uncontrollable. They also began to affect his other senses and he felt as if he could find no peace at all and wondered if this was what being a telepath had to be like – forever assaulted by someone else’s private moments and never able to be just you even inside your own mind. He was close to biting Blair’s head off every night he went on a date and it was getting harder and harder to keep Blair in the dark. Jim simply knew too much before hand, surprising Blair with his insight. No one had such good timing or so good instincts to always call him to ask if everything was alright seconds after he had burnt himself on his coffee or had had a yelling match with a professor he disliked as much as the man disliked him. 

Blair had turned his dissertation on the police force in two weeks earlier and was enjoying life till he had to prepare for his defence of it. By enjoying life Blair had apparently meant lots of women, drinking, fun…and even a few men thrown into the sexual soup for flavour. Jim had long since stopped feeling much else than hurt and pain from the nightly visions as they made his senses fly off the chart and it took him hours to get them back to a more bearable level. The men Blair encountered had broken his last holds of control. It had been easier when he thought Blair was straight but knowing he did date men meant that there had to be something wrong with him, as a person…. He didn’t even want to go there. He barely slept at all; if he didn’t receive any emotional visions from Blair he would be worrying that he might. Fatigue and the strain of trying to keep it all together made all of his senses hard to control. 

Finally, by the 15 th day after Blair had rediscovered the joys of youth and freedom that the completion of his dissertation had brought him, Jim had had enough. He didn’t want to tell Blair about all this, didn’t want him to stop doing what he enjoyed to spare his friend’s feelings but if he didn’t do something soon he would explode. Waves of awareness to his Guide kept haunting him, more and more often, stronger and stronger and soon he knew he would be drowning with no sense of self or control left. As it was he was beginning to feel like a schizophrenic, beginning to wonder which emotions were Blair’s and which were his own. 

Jim was at the station when another episode hit him, short, briefly painful and then gone as quickly as before. It was the forth episode today and after so many sleepless nights his control was shot to hell and heartache didn’t even begin to cover the agony having to live through a pained and twisted sensory replay of Blair’s sexual episodes every night was to him. Having lost all sense of patience he picked up the phone on his desk and called Blair’s office at the university, knowing Blair would be there from the feeling the visions he had received during the day had given him, though the young man had still been sleeping the night’s escapades off when he had gone to work.

“Blair,” came Blair’s tired voice, edged with urgency and a little irritation at being disturbed at this particular time.

“Sandburg, don’t keep your coffee so close to your keyboard when you’re tired – you always spill it and burn yourself. Stop being annoyed at that history professor, get more sleep at night and it’s almost 4 in the afternoon…go eat something for Christ’s sake!” Jim took a deep breath after he had said all he had to say, feeling strangely lighter at finally letting some of it out. 

It had taken time but with each episode he had over the months become aware of which episodes and sensations was connected to what through what Blair had told him when he had enquired if all was alright. He now knew which flashes meant minor things had happened, and which minor things they were, and which meant his Guide was truly in danger.

There was a long silence on Blair’s end before he said, “Wow. How did you know all that?”

Jim could hear that familiar excited ‘my Sentinel has more tricks in his bag’ voice and sighed. 

“We can talk about it tonight.”

“You want to talk?!” 

Jim smiled ruefully though no one noticed at Blair’s shocked voice.

“Believe it or not, Chief. Just promise me to stay….calm for the rest of the day.”

“Okay,” Blair agreed though the puzzlement at the unusual request was clear in his voice. “Tonight then.”

With that he hung up and Jim did likewise, wondering if he was doing the right thing. He didn’t want Blair to give up what he liked doing for his sake. On the other hand he had to be honest with himself; this thing was driving him off the wall, making his normal senses spike in tune with this new one. He couldn’t place innocents in danger because he couldn’t control this thing. He would just have to convince Blair it wasn’t necessary for him to give anything up. 

* * *

“Tell me everything!” Blair asked excitedly when Jim opened the door for him that evening and let him into the loft, having heard his approach from several blocks away. 

Jim couldn’t help but smile as he took Blair’s jacket from him and hang it up for him while Blair put his bag pack on the floor. 

“Settle down, Chief. Believe me, this thing won’t disappear in seconds.”

“I’ve investigated everything related to Sentinels and telepathy and…” Blair began eagerly, looking up at Jim as if he expected him to read his mind then and there.

“It’s not telepathy,” Jim interrupted in a firm voice, not even wanting to go there. The last thing he needed was voices in his head to add to everything else. 

“How do you know?” Blair asked curiously.

“Because, Professor, I don’t read your thoughts. Come.” Jim indicated the sofa and they sat down. 

Blair turning towards the bigger man, a curious and eager look on his face. 

“Well…what is it you do?” he pressed when Jim remained silent, wondering how to bring the topic up.

“It’s a sense, a feeling,” Jim began, fighting to put it into words. 

“A feeling of what?” 

“It depends. A feeling of you in danger, being upset, hurt….” He paused before he added with humour in his eyes yet also a tired and drawn look, “I even sense if you’re upset with one of your students.”

Blair had his ‘wow’ expression on when he asked, “You know it’s because of one of my students? How?”

Jim shook his head. 

“I’m not really sure but I do know that your…I don’t know, signals, are different depending on what is happening. If you’re upset with me I get one sense from you, if you’re upset with a student another. I don’t know what you’re upset over, I don’t ‘see’ anything in the regular sense of the word but after some time I’ve been able to put one feeling, one sense, together with a fact you have later told me.”

Blair nodded, frowning in thought. 

“That’s why you today knew I was tired and hadn’t eaten all day. I have done those things before and therefore you were able to put the sense with an event.”

Jim nodded. “Yes. The same with your coffee and the professor you always complain about.”   
  


“Do you get these senses from everyone around you?”   
  


Jim looked pale at the thought. “Thank God, no!”

“What would be so terrible about that?” Blair asked curiously and his expression clearly said that it so far sounded like a pretty cool thing to him.

Jim sighed. 

“These sensory impressions about you….they come suddenly and wash over me like…like waves crashing into my soul, my skull. Pushing, drowning me.” He paused, eyeing Blair closely to see if he would make some kind of funny remark about his choice of words and was relieved to see he didn’t. 

Blair nodded understanding and laid a calming hand on Jim’s arm. 

“You’re drowning in the impressions from me, drowning out yourself.”

  
Jim shrugged, somewhat embarrassed. “Something like that.”

Blair was thoughtful for a moment. “This might be another sense of yours. Remember when you were contacted by the ghost of Molly some months back?” 

Jim nodded; it was hard not to remember that. “Well, after that you were contacted, almost assaulted, by several more spirits wishing you to solve their deaths for them. I think you need to do here what you did then; see this sense as another ability you can control, using a dial setting, and turn it up and down depending on your needs and how much sensory impressions you can handle.”

Jim nodded. He had tried it himself but hadn’t succeeded. With Blair guiding him maybe he could do it. They went through the routine; Jim listed the settings on his 5 senses, his ‘sixth’ sense and finally this one and got them all down to a normal level if they were not already there.

“Try turning it up just a little and tell me what you sense,” Blair asked of him, having moved a little away from him.

At once an episode hit him and he grimaced in pain. “Damn,” he mumbled.

Blair was at his side at once. 

“Calm, deep breaths. Bring the dial back down,” he said, laying a hand on Jim’s arm once more.

Jim did as bid and the episode ended. He smiled and nodded to Blair. “It worked.”

“Good. Now try bring it up just a bit but not as much as before and try again.”

Jim once more did as asked. “Got it.”   
  


“Do you sense anything?”

“You’re excited, a little scared….” He frowned in concentration. “Scared for me I think.”

Blair nodded encouraging. “Yes. Go on.”

“You’re growing calmer.” 

Without thinking Jim’s hand closed over Blair’s and suddenly a world of lights and colours exploded behind his eyes. The next thing he knew was himself laying flat on his back on the floor in front of the sofa and Blair kneeling before him, looking worried down at him.

“You alright?” Blair asked concerned as he helped Jim sit up with a hand under his head. 

How had he ended on the floor? Then at once memory returned to him and he looked with amazement and wonder at Blair. 

“You love me,” his voice was certain, stating a fact but the calm and soft words seemed to echo in the room and made Blair stiffen. 

Blair visibly tried to force himself to relax. 

“Of course. You’re my best friend,” the voice was strained and not as unconcerned as it wanted to be.

Jim shook his head, the look of shock and amazement still plastered on his face. “No, you really love me.”

“Don’t be silly,” Blair’s voice was weak and shaking, seemly even to his own ears for even he did not look convinced of the words he said.

“When we touched I felt it. I’ve not used this ability while we touched each other before,” Jim mumbled softly, a smile spreading over his lips as he tried to absorb what he knew. Blair loved him! Him! 

“Jim, I think it’ll be a good idea to…” Blair started to say as he tried to pull away from him. 

“I’ve waited too long for this to keep dancing around it,” Jim interjected and without another word he pulled his legs under him and reached for Blair. 

He kept the younger man on his knees on the floor beside him as he with a strong hand behind his head drew Blair into a forceful but passionate kiss. Ignoring Blair’s weak attempts to pull away their lips met and as they did so light and colours exploded for them both. 

Without knowing he was doing it Blair laid his arms around Jim’s neck as Jim held him closer. Waves of love, protectiveness and tenderness slammed into Blair and he ended on top of Jim on the floor from the power of the mental impressions slamming into him. Then everything went black. “Chief?” A soft voice was calling him but Blair felt too good and warm to awake. His head was nestled against a warm and broad chest, his legs sheltered between someone else’s. He liked it here.

“Blair?” The loving voice brought Blair back and made him open his eyes. He was leaning against Jim on the sofa and the other man had his arms around him from behind.

“What happened?” Blair asked and turned around so he could see Jim’s face. The pure love and care he read there almost took his breath away.

“We passed out. Probably from the onslaught of the emotional waves or whatever the hell they are we received from each other. Not very manly I know,” he said teasingly, no hints of embarrassment or hesitation in his voice when he spoke of his abilities and what had happened. A new kind of peace and contentment seemed to have settled over him. 

“You…I….what I felt…?” Blair stuttered, clearly almost afraid to ask, afraid it might not be true after all and this seemed a possibility he couldn’t handle. The raw need and yearning on his face said clearer than words that he wanted this too much to ever want to let go. 

Jim nodded in confirmation. “My feelings for you. You felt them, didn’t you?”

Blair nodded, wonder in his eyes as the impossible happened. 

“You love me.” 

As he thought about what he had felt, a love so deep, pure and all consuming, he had a hard time believing anyone could love him so completely. Jim’s love was as a rock, steady, strong, always there and always present. All he ever needed to do was reach out. Never trying to keep him captive or strangle him; Jim’s love was a calm reminder of how simple love truly was. 

“Wow…you  **really** love me!” Blair said when he opened eyes he hadn’t known he had closed and had ‘felt’ Jim’s love within him, between them, their hands touching and holding the connection. 

Jim nodded seriously. 

“More than anything else, babe.” With that he kissed the top of his head. Blair’s love formed in his mind an image of a comforting blanket. Warm, giving, ever present and able to offer the support he could never ask for. It was the fuel that kept him going, that made him strong. 

“Babe?!” Blair questioned but then a smile spread over his lips as he seemed to have turned the word over in his head. “I can live with that.”

“Good for I don’t intend on letting you go…” he paused and his eyes briefly reflected pain as he remembered so many nights he had spent alone and in emotional and sensory agony from the onslaught of Blair’s affairs. “Or share you.”

“I never loved any of them,” Blair quickly assured him, unaware that Jim knew more than just that he had had dates so many nights. “They were poor substitutes for you but I needed something to make me feel alive and I thought I could never have you.”

Jim shook his head and softly stroked his cheek. “You always had me.”

Blair smiled widely. “Likewise…. definitely likewise.”

He reached up for a kiss and this time there was just a flow of love and gentleness washing over them but no waves to crash or drown them.

“Whenever we touch I can feel what you feel for me,” Blair said with wonder and joy in his voice and eyes when they drew apart for breath. “I…I have never felt that kind of love before.” Truth be told it was overwhelming but he was quick to decide that it was a good kind of overwhelming. 

Jim nodded and tightened his hold on him. “Me neither,” he said softly.

“I wonder if I will also be able to feel you over a distance,” Blair mused, ever the scientist.

“Maybe,” Jim said, his brain not having caught up with him yet. He was still simply enjoying this moment, the feeling that he was now free to touch his Guide, taste him, claim him as his, fall asleep beside him and wake up to his face in the morning… all the things he had dreamt of doing and having for so long. “Though if you have no dials then it’ll be a mess,” Jim said with pained experience in his voice. 

Was the ability to make mental dials and controls like that a Sentinel thing? Blair wasn’t sure though it would seem likely. It made sense that a Sentinel would always be able to ‘sense’ his Guide, no matter how far away he or she might wander. However, in the past the Sentinel would have been a watchman and a warrior; there would be no need for a Guide to always be able to sense him as he would never wander far from the people he was destined to guard and protect and he would stay even closer to the Guide who was his lifeline. However, right now he didn’t care about theories; he had better things to do. He nestled back against Jim, resting against his chest and laid his arms above Jim’s where they were holding him across his waist.

“Love you,” Blair said softly, warmly. He needed to say it as he felt an overwhelming love come back into him from Jim and he noticed their intertwined fingers holding a light blue glow.

“Love you too,” Jim said softly and at his words the glow at their hands grew stronger. 

Had Jim been able to resurrect him using this bond between them? Even one sided it seemed to have been enough to bring him back. It seemed likely that it was the ‘kiss’ he had given him when he had tried to resurrect him, that had opened the bond on Jim’s side as Jim’s kiss a little earlier had done for him. Blair let his mind rest; there was time enough for answers later. Right now it was enough to lie here in Jim’s arms and be at peace. 

Jim smiled happily, his Guide warm and safe in his embrace. This was everything he had ever hoped for. His senses truly had proved themselves to be a blessing for what man could be more blessed than to have waves of love crashing into his soul whenever he touched the one person he cared for more than life itself? 

**_The End_ **


End file.
